Doesn’t it feel good when ‘you’re on the same page?’ And of course, when you feel connected, you can feel the magic happening, kind of like a warm cup of bliss.
Yes, those things often happen by accident, but what if you could create that feeling of being totally connected on purpose?
I call those experiences magic because it really does feel like magic, on a level of consciousness that is above our usual day-do-day.
And in a way, that’s actually what’s going on. You see, it has to do with your hearts being in-sync. And I’m not talking about a ‘boy band.’
From the deepest cell level, we’re energy. You and your partner are sending out enticing energy, repellent energy, and very often, neutral energy where there’s no connection, even though you might be in the same room, or sitting side by side. Most of the time, this all goes on in a completely unconscious state of being.
Maybe you you had a bad day. You’re cranky, your shoulders are tight, you’re hungry, and your feet hurt. Your energy is not going to be positive and radiant, certainly not loving. In The Five Facets Of Feminine Grace Workshop, I compare your energy to a dimmer switch.
What’s your dimmer switch right now, as you read this, and what is it’s usual setting? How would it be if the above described how you felt at the end of the day?
When your energy is low, it’s likely you’re not going to be feeling in-love or loving, and you’ll have lost your connection.
But what if you decided you didn’t want all those things to cause your connection to be broken? What if you realized that in that moment, you need to be connected more than ever?
Well, it turns out there are things you can do that will literally, create a heart-to-heart connection.
Scientists have been doing some pretty fascinating things to understand what goes on in our brains and our hearts when we’re in love.
You can change what’s going on in your brain (meaning what parts light up) just by thinking about your partner lovingly. Your brain controls your chemical reactions and when you cause those love thoughts to light up those sections of your brain associated with love, your chemistry changes by producing dopamine (which makes you feel good), which produces serotonin, often called the “happy hormone.”
Now, let’s look at the heart connection. When your energy is uplifted by thinking about, being with, touching your partner, as well as imagining your heart energy flowing to and from your partner, the energy that emanates from your heart can literally flow into your partners, and his to you. This is actually being studied by the Heart Math Institute.
So just thinking about loving your partner will help you feel better, but it will also cause a physiologically felt connection. And no matter what the science is, it feels frickin’ good.
A great plan for when either of you feel you’ve ‘lost that lovin’ feelin” is to make a pact to do an this Re-Connection Technique)
Here’s one variation, and obviously, the most effective:
- Sit together, side by side
- Hold hands
- Give each other a kiss
- Close your eyes
- Think about how much you love each other and how grateful you are you’re together
- Imagine a beautiful ribbon of loving energy flowing between the two of you, back and fourth, surrounding you, filling you up
- When one of you is ready to stop this process, squeeze the others hand
- Stand up and give each other a warm, lingering, full bodied hug
As you’re doing this, your brain will begin to light up in the areas that have to do with love, your chemistry will change, and you will not only feel better, you’ll feel in-love and connected.
Another variation is to do it together at a distance (like over the phone), or if you’re the only one feeling low, do it by yourself, thinking about being in love with your partner and wrapping them in loving energy.
Any of these variations will help you feel more connected. If either of you are unwilling to do this, then there’s a big fat conversation that needs to happen. Or maybe a coaching session with me.
Helping you make magic, everywhere you go,
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me…It was her beautiful younger sister.
I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.
