How Are Love and Hate the Same?

emotionsNight before last I had a dream. In it, there was a friend I haven’t seen or thought about for many years. She was glowing with a light that seemed to emanate from her heart.

She said she needed me to show how love and hate are alike.

Huh? I had no idea what she meant.

I woke up and didn’t think much about it. But then a thought came to me, which is what I wrote on this image.

Both love and hate take work to keep them going. But there isn’t room for them to be in your heart at the same time.

Love pushes hate away.

Hate pushes love away.

This idea fits on a small scale, with an individual, or on a global scale, with entire societies.

So because each has to be chosen, fostered, and fed, it’s a matter of what you want for yourself. For someone who is filled with hate, and that hate guides their thinking and actions, they cannot be happy. Happiness is a part of what makes love.

The bottom line is that it’s a choice.

And if you have children, you will teach them what is in your heart. Look around the world, and you can see it is true.

Please choose love,

Kara Oh, Author

You Should Always Choose the Best You

Young couple having fun in the kitchenI love to read. Actually, so much so, that I’ve wished there were two of me. One who read twenty-four hours a day, who would send the info over to the other me, that was out there doing life.

But alas, there’s only me. One way I get my reading in is to always have an audio book in my car. Today, I was listening to a very fun read, London Is the Best City In America, by Laura Dave. The protagonist, Emmie, said something really profound and I wanted to share it with you here.

She said (not an exact quote), “When choosing between two people, it’s not the people you need to choose between, it’s choosing which version of you you want to be.”

That makes total sense because each person we have a relationship with, whether it’s a romantic relationship, or a girlfriend, or anyone else, we show up a little bit different with each.

So choose who you most like and enjoy being, and you’ll be happy.

Every good novel offers lessons about life that can be taken into our hearts so we can become better people.

To great reading,


Why Men Love Dirty Talk

kiss-2I got so many great emails about Felicity’s last guest blog post, 3 Naughty Phrases That Drive Men Wild, I asked her for another. Enjoy…

Guest article by Felicity Keith

It should come as no surprise that guys dig dirty talk. But have you ever considered the reasons why this form of sexual play is just so dang arousing to him? Let’s take a dive into why dirty talk drives him wild.

1. It’s an arousing surprise

If you have a ladylike public persona but behind closed doors you let explicit phrases tumble from your mouth, the contradiction gives him a sexy charge of excitement. And even if you aren’t the pinnacle of propriety, seeing you transform into a naughty vixen gives him a titillating thrill. This heightens his senses and makes everything that much more arousing for him.

2. He feels like a sex-god

When you let loose with a string of moans and screams mixed with a variety of sexy play-by-plays and dirty directives, you show him just how much you F#$*king love what he’s doing to you. Your unbridled enthusiasm tells him in no uncertain terms that he’s rocking your socks.

3. Your confidence attracts him

A woman who has the self-confidence to use dirty phrases to get what she wants in bed is downright seductive. Men are drawn to women who aren’t afraid to express themselves sexually. And generally, your use of dirty talk clues him in that you are far from uptight or inhibited. A good time is in store for you both!

4. It shows you are totally in the moment

Enthusiasm is such a huge turn-on for men. A quiet partner can be misunderstood as a bored or distracted partner, and that can put a big damper on the sexy mood. When you talk dirty, not only are YOU 100% present and in the moment, it shows him that you are. That level of engagement with what’s happening between you serves to validate that he’s pleasing you.

All of the reasons above activate different chemicals in his brain and are hitting some of the big triggers for his sex drive. Who knew that there was some science behind talking dirty? Of course, not every woman feels comfortable launching into dirty talk, and if that sounds like you, you are not alone. But don’t let your fears stop you from incorporating this fun technique into your sex life. In the program Language of Desire I teach you ways to get over any shyness you may feel and give you over 200 dirty phrases that you can fine-tune to suit your taste level.

Have fun,





P.S. Finally, someone has come up with a program that teaches ‘nice’ women like us how to talk naughty. You know you’ve wanted to, and now you can. Watch the video here, or if you prefer to read about it, you can go here.

Lessons From Lucy

DogLoveGiveTakeEven if Lucy could write, I don’t think it would ever occur to her to keep a scorecard.

What’s a scorecard?

It’s when you keep track of all the little slights, the perceived insults, all the things he should have done.

Lucy doesn’t keep score.

She gives her love freely.

Of course, she has a human who doesn’t kick her, or say mean things to her.

She’s appreciated simply because she’s always available to love and be loved.

That’s what she wants you to know.

If you have legitimate complaints, you need to either address them so they can be resolved, or if they can’t, walk away.

If Lucy’s human started being mean to her, she’d stick around, because she doesn’t have the brain power to figure out what else to do.

But you do. So don’t stay in a situation that is bad for you.

Too often, however, women get upset because a man isn’t behaving properly. Unlike Lucy, your guy isn’t a dog that simply needs more training.

The only kind of scorecard you should be keeping on each other is all the ways you enhance each others’ lives. Then remind each other all-the-time.SecretLanguage

If there are things that are getting in the way of doing that, then communication is the way to sort it out so you can get back to loving. Want to know how to communicate on ANY topic, no matter how difficult it might be? Get my book, The Secret Language Of Long Term Lovers. You’ll be glad you did.

Join my Happy School and start living like Lucy,


3 Naughty Phrases that Drive Men Wild

happy_couple2Guest Article by Felicity Keith

Words that turn a man on trigger a specific response in him, both physically and emotionally. What matters to most guys is that his sexual prowess is validated. He wants to know that you love what he’s doing and that his masculinity is arousing you. There is an almost universal male archetype of the strong sex-god rock star who is able to magically seduce and satisfy women. Yes, even your brainiac math whiz-type has a fantasy of being THAT guy. When you say these phrases, it’s like you’ve crawled right into his sexual imagination.

Here are a few phrases you can say to him can give him that feeling of sex-god rock star he craves.

You feel so incredible.

Or you can fill in the blank with any kind of adjective there: amazing, big, good, fantastic, hard, huge, awesome. Add in the f-word for a more explicit effect. You get the idea. When you are having intercourse, telling him just how great he feels to you is the ultimate compliment. This validates his prowess and physicality in real-time. And you’ll learn in my program Language of Desire just how much importance most guys place on their penis.

Don’t stop!

It could be any command really: harder, right there, give it to me. Again, feel free to add in curse words and explicit language. Giving him a command during sex to keep doing exactly what he’s doing to you is confident and hot. It’s hot because it shows him just how much you are enjoying it. Men say the number one thing they love during sex is an enthusiastic partner!

I can’t get enough of you OR I’m so turned on by you.

This phrase speaks to his ability to arouse you. That he turns you into a sex-hungry vixen who wants his body all the time. Is that an exaggeration? Sure. But think about how often we unwittingly turn our partners away because we are tired, or have a headache, or just aren’t in the mood. This doesn’t mean you have to be ready to go at it 24/7. However, when you feed his ego that he has the ability to drive you wild with desire you make him feel amazing, especially when you say this phrase outside of the bedroom. The idea that his woman is distracted in the middle of the day by sexy thoughts of him? Rawr.

If you want over 200+ ideas, phrases, and text messages to drive your man wild with desire for you, make sure to check out my new program, Language of Desire. I give you step by step instructions and tons of exact words to use to get exactly what you both want in and out of the bedroom.

Watch my video here and see how you can get him thinking about, and wanting ONLY YOU…

Thanks, Felicity. I love this program because it’s exactly what every ‘good’ girl needs to keep her guy crazy about her… I wanted more from Felicity, so here’s another article you’ll like: Why Men Like Dirty Talk